Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Rockets & Chicken: New Photo Rules

Camille: I had an interesting conversation with a group of co-workers the other day, where they told me I basically have the same face in most of my pictures. You know, when I do that open mouth surprise/happy face.

Yeah. That one. And I was telling them I don't usually like how I look in pictures so it got to the point where I thought I might as well look silly. How did you find yourself purposefully photo bombing?


Dante: As you can tell from the pictures that I take myself I like to get people in conversation and have it look more natural. Set up pictures just give me more time to think. Its like when I watch myself on video I make faces I didn't even know I had. So saying to me "Get ready!" just means you have given more permission to think of a face to make.

How is it possible that Dante is single?!

I don't do it to be funny. Its just a reflex at this point. That's why when I take pictures of myself I wear a mask or just have my mouth shut and face blank. And I think you look lovely in your pictures. I just thought of something. You say you do the surprise happy face but there's also the eyes shut pose. So you have two of them!

Camille: The eyes shut isn't a pose. That's just what happens a lot of the time! You have a normal, handsome, photo face. Like in one of those pics Donna posted, you're just standing there with a big ol' grin. Awwwww!

This and any great looking photo was taken by Donna Williams.

How about other folks? Remember the self-portrait-a-la-mirror that was so popular? Those were all hideous. Why do you think those were so popular?

Dante: The eyes shut is totally a pose. If its a thing its a pose. You have to be told not to close your eyes. And thanks for the handsome comment. I was telling someone last week that no one ever comments on my face.

As for the mirror pose...ugh. I never understood it. People look puzzled and the camera is blocking most of their face. I never understood the purpose of the shot. Its not a good look and I wish people would stop doing it. The only time its acceptable is for asking people an opinion on clothing or nudity. Sorry but its true. 

This is as awkward as you think its sexy. 

Can we also put a ban on the duck lip pose and the holding the camera overhead and looking down shot? That isn't cute.

Camille: Make it official. Rockets and Chicken is officially against:

Mirror Self-Portraits (aka Anthony Weiner-ing)

No Wiener!


No duck lippin'!

Camera Overhead Self-Portraits

That means you, Tom Hardy!

Dante: I would like to add dudes posing with shirts off, having bodyparts as a profile image, and ugly baby pictures. People know when their baby is ugly and its time for us to take a stand.

Camille: "Dudes posing with shirts off, having bodyparts as a profile image." That's Anthony Weinering. Remember that senator who got in trouble for sending out the picture of his wee-wee? That's him. Here! Here! to the ugly baby pictures.

Surely they don't mean me...?


Hoozle said...

That's... Tom Hardy. Really? Cor. *mind drifts for a bit*

Yeah I just sent a link to that photo to all my friends. Thanks, Dante!

Dante said...

Yes, that's actually him you pervert. I swear. He is violating the rules so hard but you don't care! He is flashing pube! A definite no-no!

Caroline said...

I like that I'm in a good number of these photos -- so I feel like I'm just straight up bombing your blog and free time. Kaboom. :)

Dante said...

You have created some nice form of photobombing! If you tried to bomb my free time you'd be exhausted.

Sort of Camille said...

Bomb away as long as you follow the rules, Caroline! I'm disappointed about Tom Hardy. You know my pinky toe curled for him after I saw Warrior. But with duck lips and a crotch-view self portrait....he loses several cool points.

Dante said...

Even the mighty Tom Hardy isn't safe from being banned because of duck lips?! I thought I'd heard it all! He has multiple violations going on in that picture.

Hoozle said...

Rules are for boy scouts, vegetarians and losers! Besides, he's obviously pulling that pose with a heavy dose of irony. The gleam in his eye is worth many cool points.

Dante said...

Whatever you wanna tell yourself as you type with one hand, missy. I believe he is very serious. And pubes! Stop that, sir! I'm gonna have to have a chat with him the next time we're at the gym.

Hoozle said...

At one point I may have been typing with my nose.